"You ain't no Rambo, shorty"
Before I dive into season 23 I took a look at season 22 to see what I missed. A bunch of recurring sketches it appears. The Roxbury Guys, The Spartan Cheerleaders, The Joe Pesci Show, Goat Boy, Mary Katharine Gallagher, Joe Blow, anything that appeared in season 21 and got some laughs got repeated the next season over and over again. It's pretty much the reason why I skipped a season in my recaps, I would quickly run out of things to say about these characters. It was also an election year so we got a lot of Norm as Bob Dole running against Bill Clinton. I chose this season primarily because it was Norm MacDonald's last year and also it was the last year I religiously watched SNL for a while. This was my freshman year in high school and SNL was a big part of my life. Then they fired Norm and I started to lose my fanaticism. I became a casual watcher during high school and college and only got back into watching every episode around season 38 when I got digital cable and a DVR. During these days, staying up late on Saturday night was a treat and I never missed an episode, either new or rerun.
Cold Open: Oprah
Before I dive into season 23 I took a look at season 22 to see what I missed. A bunch of recurring sketches it appears. The Roxbury Guys, The Spartan Cheerleaders, The Joe Pesci Show, Goat Boy, Mary Katharine Gallagher, Joe Blow, anything that appeared in season 21 and got some laughs got repeated the next season over and over again. It's pretty much the reason why I skipped a season in my recaps, I would quickly run out of things to say about these characters. It was also an election year so we got a lot of Norm as Bob Dole running against Bill Clinton. I chose this season primarily because it was Norm MacDonald's last year and also it was the last year I religiously watched SNL for a while. This was my freshman year in high school and SNL was a big part of my life. Then they fired Norm and I started to lose my fanaticism. I became a casual watcher during high school and college and only got back into watching every episode around season 38 when I got digital cable and a DVR. During these days, staying up late on Saturday night was a treat and I never missed an episode, either new or rerun.
Cold Open: Oprah
3 Stars
Marv Albert discusses his sexual indiscretions on Oprah
How quaint that this was the big story of the summer that SNL opened its season with. I hate to compare everything to our current political climate but how I long for the days when a sportscaster who bit a lady's back while wearing women's underwear was the story that dominated our news. Tim Meadows plays Oprah, she says she lost 7 pounds but gained 35 and then welcomes her guest Marv Albert. He wants to talk about his book but Oprah is only interested in his freaky sex habits like nipple clamps and ass bracelets.
"I like to eat baklava, baby back ribs and back bacon. But you like to eat back."
"Yes! And ass!"
Fellow back biter, Mike Tyson is in the audience and stands by Marv's claim that he was provoked into biting the woman. Marv says he is aided by the support of his fiancee and close family friend, Rod and we cut to the audience where Molly Shannon is seen with a buff shirtless man. So good to see Norm again in my SNL recaps. He's funny here as Marv. One thing that struck me as peculiar was seeing Tim as Oprah. There was no real impression done and no real jokes from the character. Having a man in drag should be a funny thing but this just felt like they didn't have any black female cast members so Tim had to do it.
Sylvester Stallone Monologue
How quaint that this was the big story of the summer that SNL opened its season with. I hate to compare everything to our current political climate but how I long for the days when a sportscaster who bit a lady's back while wearing women's underwear was the story that dominated our news. Tim Meadows plays Oprah, she says she lost 7 pounds but gained 35 and then welcomes her guest Marv Albert. He wants to talk about his book but Oprah is only interested in his freaky sex habits like nipple clamps and ass bracelets.
"I like to eat baklava, baby back ribs and back bacon. But you like to eat back."
"Yes! And ass!"
Fellow back biter, Mike Tyson is in the audience and stands by Marv's claim that he was provoked into biting the woman. Marv says he is aided by the support of his fiancee and close family friend, Rod and we cut to the audience where Molly Shannon is seen with a buff shirtless man. So good to see Norm again in my SNL recaps. He's funny here as Marv. One thing that struck me as peculiar was seeing Tim as Oprah. There was no real impression done and no real jokes from the character. Having a man in drag should be a funny thing but this just felt like they didn't have any black female cast members so Tim had to do it.
Sylvester Stallone Monologue
3 Stars
Stallone gets a pep talk from Mickey when his monologue starts to tank
Sly is happy to be doing more thoughtful movies like Cop Land (he later regretted doing the film) and he wants to be taken seriously now as opposed to being a dumb action star. When he starts to talk about campaign finance reform he is interrupted by his old trainer and corner man Mickey. He encourages Sly to talk like a gorilla and give the people what they want. Tracy Morgan comes out as Clubber Lang to pity any fool who has to watch this monologue. Sly doesn't want to sound stupid but Mickey insists and Stallone stands up to the Rocky theme.
"You want it? Here it is! Yo, Adrian! I did it!"
The American flag drops down and balloons fall and Chris Kattan stands up in the crowd dressed as Talia Shire to give him a kiss. Stallone comes off as pretty loose and affable. I'm getting ready for a good show.
Xerox Assjet 790
Sly is happy to be doing more thoughtful movies like Cop Land (he later regretted doing the film) and he wants to be taken seriously now as opposed to being a dumb action star. When he starts to talk about campaign finance reform he is interrupted by his old trainer and corner man Mickey. He encourages Sly to talk like a gorilla and give the people what they want. Tracy Morgan comes out as Clubber Lang to pity any fool who has to watch this monologue. Sly doesn't want to sound stupid but Mickey insists and Stallone stands up to the Rocky theme.
"You want it? Here it is! Yo, Adrian! I did it!"
The American flag drops down and balloons fall and Chris Kattan stands up in the crowd dressed as Talia Shire to give him a kiss. Stallone comes off as pretty loose and affable. I'm getting ready for a good show.
Xerox Assjet 790
4 Stars
An office copy machine specifically for the ass
Will is describing a sophisticated copier while Jim is seen pulling down his pants getting ready to copy his buttocks. When Jim's butt breaks the glass of the copy machine, Will tells us its limitations.
"But can it copy your ass?"
The Xerox Assjet 790 gives you quality ass copy every time and even includes a custom ass bucket for comfort and to reduce breakage. It also has a mosaic printer so you can make a very big ass copy. It's a very stupid commercial parody but also very funny. After reviewing season 16 recently I was nervous we were gonna get a Richmeister cameo but now that I think about it, that would have been a pretty funny button for the sketch.
New Car
2 Stars
Rita DelVecchio's husband brings home a new Cadillac
Rita is raking leaves on her porch and waiting for her husband to drive home with their new car. She has made "Welcome Home New Car Meatballs" for the neighbor kids. Stallone shows up with a bad comb-over and a new Caddy. It's got trunk space, The Club, wheel locks and an alarm that says, "Back away from the freaking car". Before they can go for a drive, Molly shows up and tells Rita that she'll have to move the seat up. Rita gets upset that her husband took this tramp for a ride before her but all is quickly forgiven when he promises to drive her to Atlantic City to see Frank.
"Sinatra!"
"No, Stallone. He's just as good."
I appreciate Cheri Oteri's commitment to this character but I never found it particularly funny or interesting.
Accident
Will is describing a sophisticated copier while Jim is seen pulling down his pants getting ready to copy his buttocks. When Jim's butt breaks the glass of the copy machine, Will tells us its limitations.
"But can it copy your ass?"
The Xerox Assjet 790 gives you quality ass copy every time and even includes a custom ass bucket for comfort and to reduce breakage. It also has a mosaic printer so you can make a very big ass copy. It's a very stupid commercial parody but also very funny. After reviewing season 16 recently I was nervous we were gonna get a Richmeister cameo but now that I think about it, that would have been a pretty funny button for the sketch.
New Car
2 Stars
Rita DelVecchio's husband brings home a new Cadillac
Rita is raking leaves on her porch and waiting for her husband to drive home with their new car. She has made "Welcome Home New Car Meatballs" for the neighbor kids. Stallone shows up with a bad comb-over and a new Caddy. It's got trunk space, The Club, wheel locks and an alarm that says, "Back away from the freaking car". Before they can go for a drive, Molly shows up and tells Rita that she'll have to move the seat up. Rita gets upset that her husband took this tramp for a ride before her but all is quickly forgiven when he promises to drive her to Atlantic City to see Frank.
"Sinatra!"
"No, Stallone. He's just as good."
I appreciate Cheri Oteri's commitment to this character but I never found it particularly funny or interesting.
Accident
5 Stars
Stallone helps a car crash victim who happens to be a cinephile
Norm is bleeding after a car crash but Sylvester Stallone comes running over to help.
"I saw a white light and felt an inner peace but then that guy from Rhinestone showed up."
Sly keeps asking about his well being but Norm only wants to point out the lesser films of his career like Judge Dredd, Cobra, Staying Alive and Paradise Alley.
"Let me ask you something. What were you thinking when you made Over The Top? You had to arm wrestle a guy for custody of your son. Now that I think of it, it was an excellent movie. It combined the emotional drama of a custody child hearing with arm wrestling. Remember Kramer Vs. Kramer? That movie was about a child custody hearing but it was missing something. What was it? Oh, I know, arm wrestling!"
All this takes a toll on Stallone who punches Norm out. The ambulance arrives, shocked that Sylvester Stallone is punching car crash victims. As Norm starts to fade away he utters his final words.
"Stop...Stop...Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot sucked."
This had everything I love in an SNL sketch, meta humor, mocking the host and of course, Norm.
The Roxbury Guys
Norm is bleeding after a car crash but Sylvester Stallone comes running over to help.
"I saw a white light and felt an inner peace but then that guy from Rhinestone showed up."
Sly keeps asking about his well being but Norm only wants to point out the lesser films of his career like Judge Dredd, Cobra, Staying Alive and Paradise Alley.
"Let me ask you something. What were you thinking when you made Over The Top? You had to arm wrestle a guy for custody of your son. Now that I think of it, it was an excellent movie. It combined the emotional drama of a custody child hearing with arm wrestling. Remember Kramer Vs. Kramer? That movie was about a child custody hearing but it was missing something. What was it? Oh, I know, arm wrestling!"
All this takes a toll on Stallone who punches Norm out. The ambulance arrives, shocked that Sylvester Stallone is punching car crash victims. As Norm starts to fade away he utters his final words.
"Stop...Stop...Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot sucked."
This had everything I love in an SNL sketch, meta humor, mocking the host and of course, Norm.
The Roxbury Guys
3 Stars
The Roxbury Guys take Rocky Balboa for a night on the town
Rocky is jogging down the street and is quickly joined by The Roxbury Guys who take him to a club. They drink beers, Rocky drinks a glass of raw egg, they dance with ladies, he starts sparring with a woman. Then he drops to his knees and claims that he can't dance. They take him to dancing school where he learns to bop his head the Roxbury Guys way. Back at the club that night he starts to disco dance wildly before being joined by a group of enthusiastic children. It's your typical throw the host in with the recurring characters sketch but Sly's misguided commitment made it watchable.
Investigation
Rocky is jogging down the street and is quickly joined by The Roxbury Guys who take him to a club. They drink beers, Rocky drinks a glass of raw egg, they dance with ladies, he starts sparring with a woman. Then he drops to his knees and claims that he can't dance. They take him to dancing school where he learns to bop his head the Roxbury Guys way. Back at the club that night he starts to disco dance wildly before being joined by a group of enthusiastic children. It's your typical throw the host in with the recurring characters sketch but Sly's misguided commitment made it watchable.
Investigation
3 Stars
Janet Reno has a moment of doubt regarding investigating president Clinton
Attorney General Janet Reno is getting some files read to her before suspected Olympic Park bomber, Richard Jewell shows up for his 3 o'clock meeting. He punches her in the stomach and leaves. The real life Richard Jewell plays himself here, getting a delayed reaction from the audience. Then president Clinton shows up to ask if she is still going forward with the investigation into his campaign finance. She says she needs some time to think so we get footage of Reno walking on the beach, in a bubble bath with her cats and scuba diving before telling Clinton that she's gonna hire a special prosecutor and "bite his head off, Reno style". She kisses him before roughing him up. Not much substance here, basically just an excuse to showcase Will's absurd Janet Reno impression, which is fine.
Fun With Real Audio
Attorney General Janet Reno is getting some files read to her before suspected Olympic Park bomber, Richard Jewell shows up for his 3 o'clock meeting. He punches her in the stomach and leaves. The real life Richard Jewell plays himself here, getting a delayed reaction from the audience. Then president Clinton shows up to ask if she is still going forward with the investigation into his campaign finance. She says she needs some time to think so we get footage of Reno walking on the beach, in a bubble bath with her cats and scuba diving before telling Clinton that she's gonna hire a special prosecutor and "bite his head off, Reno style". She kisses him before roughing him up. Not much substance here, basically just an excuse to showcase Will's absurd Janet Reno impression, which is fine.
Fun With Real Audio
Casablanca Outtakes
3 Stars
Bogie has a flatulence problem on set
It's the famous airport scene between Rick and Ilsa but Rick keeps farting. He farts, farts again, then farts again, walks away and farts for a comically long time, a cat attacks him, fart, fart. There's no punchline, it's just a fart joke but since it's animated it's quick and timed pretty well. I liked it but I was embarrassed that I did.
Weekend Update
It's the famous airport scene between Rick and Ilsa but Rick keeps farting. He farts, farts again, then farts again, walks away and farts for a comically long time, a cat attacks him, fart, fart. There's no punchline, it's just a fart joke but since it's animated it's quick and timed pretty well. I liked it but I was embarrassed that I did.
Weekend Update
"Bob Dylan turned The Beatles on to marijuana. In return George Harrison turned Dylan on to looking old and haggard"
Oh God, I missed Norm. To me this segment is a complete waste of time with any other Weekend Update anchor. Topical jokes don't age well but Norm's jokes (even when they were pulled from the headlines) always had punchlines that will stand the test of time.
Chelsea Clinton is off to Stanford and while it is hard for the president to see his daughter grow up at least he'll feel less guilty about hitting on her friends.
The WNBA is announcing some rule changes to improve play including extended playoffs, increasing salaries, bringing back the 3 point line and replacing all the female players with guys.
Michael Jackson's wife is pregnant with his 2nd child. When asked why he chose to become a father again so soon he said that his 7 month old son is starting to lose his looks.
Crack babies are reportedly as happy and healthy as normal children. I thought they'd be way more happy with all that crack in their system.
Headlining comedian for the Lilith Fair tour, Cinder Calhoun shows up to tell some jokes from her act. Like when she told Tracy Chapman she had a fast car or when she called Fiona Apple, Fiona Snapple. Then she sings a song she wrote called "Sausage Of Pain". The segment was a little long for something that was intentionally unfunny. The song she sang was actually pretty good but this just got in the way of Norm jokes.
Falsely accused Olympic bomber, Richard Jewell shows up. Norm is skeptical that he was not actually the bomber because Tom Brokaw reported he was and Tom is factually accurate 60-70% of the time. Richard insists that he is innocent. When Norm talks about the death of Princess Diana, Richard mentions the two other people.
"Who said anything about two other people? You seem to know a lot about this."
Norm also accuses Richard of murdering Mother Teresa.
Chelsea Clinton is off to Stanford and while it is hard for the president to see his daughter grow up at least he'll feel less guilty about hitting on her friends.
The WNBA is announcing some rule changes to improve play including extended playoffs, increasing salaries, bringing back the 3 point line and replacing all the female players with guys.
Michael Jackson's wife is pregnant with his 2nd child. When asked why he chose to become a father again so soon he said that his 7 month old son is starting to lose his looks.
Crack babies are reportedly as happy and healthy as normal children. I thought they'd be way more happy with all that crack in their system.
Headlining comedian for the Lilith Fair tour, Cinder Calhoun shows up to tell some jokes from her act. Like when she told Tracy Chapman she had a fast car or when she called Fiona Apple, Fiona Snapple. Then she sings a song she wrote called "Sausage Of Pain". The segment was a little long for something that was intentionally unfunny. The song she sang was actually pretty good but this just got in the way of Norm jokes.
Falsely accused Olympic bomber, Richard Jewell shows up. Norm is skeptical that he was not actually the bomber because Tom Brokaw reported he was and Tom is factually accurate 60-70% of the time. Richard insists that he is innocent. When Norm talks about the death of Princess Diana, Richard mentions the two other people.
"Who said anything about two other people? You seem to know a lot about this."
Norm also accuses Richard of murdering Mother Teresa.
Before Stallone can introduce the musical guest he is interrupted by Joe Pesci who is upset that he wasn't in Cop Land. De Niro, Liotta and Keitel all got cast but Pesci is stuck doing 8 Heads In A Duffel Bag with friggin' David Spade. I didn't find this exceptionally funny but I do always like when the show breaks tradition and makes a bit out of the musical guest introduction.
Jamiroquai
"Alright"
Jamiroquai
"Alright"
This was always a song I liked, much more than the hit single 'Virtual Insanity' from the same album. Jamiroquai does some crazy dances during the musical breaks which makes it fun to watch as well as fun to listen to.
The Computer Station
4 Stars
A computer store employee has difficulty transitioning to his new job
Will is looking for a new computer with a Pentium processor but is helped by Leon, a shy and confused man who seems to know nothing about computers. Leon tells Will that this computer kicks ass, mentions that the computer he wants is for gays and tries to sell him the vending machine, a super Star Trek computer that gives you potato chips. It's revealed that Leon used to work at this store when it was an Orange Julius and lived in the backroom when it was remodeled into a computer store. They found him with a cup of nails he was calling Orange Julius. He tried to make his own recipe for Orange Julius but most people got sick and some died. Will reveals himself to be Samuel K. Julius, grandson of the founder of Orange Julius and offers Leon a job selling the product in Germany. A good sketch with a beginning, middle and end and Stallone played this bizarre character incredibly well. He did a great job of playing a role that is the exact opposite of what he's known for.
We get a Lost Deep Thoughts, not sure where they went but this one is about the saddest thing you'll ever see is a mosquito sucking on a mummy. Forget it little friend.
Planet Hollywood
3 Stars
Will is looking for a new computer with a Pentium processor but is helped by Leon, a shy and confused man who seems to know nothing about computers. Leon tells Will that this computer kicks ass, mentions that the computer he wants is for gays and tries to sell him the vending machine, a super Star Trek computer that gives you potato chips. It's revealed that Leon used to work at this store when it was an Orange Julius and lived in the backroom when it was remodeled into a computer store. They found him with a cup of nails he was calling Orange Julius. He tried to make his own recipe for Orange Julius but most people got sick and some died. Will reveals himself to be Samuel K. Julius, grandson of the founder of Orange Julius and offers Leon a job selling the product in Germany. A good sketch with a beginning, middle and end and Stallone played this bizarre character incredibly well. He did a great job of playing a role that is the exact opposite of what he's known for.
We get a Lost Deep Thoughts, not sure where they went but this one is about the saddest thing you'll ever see is a mosquito sucking on a mummy. Forget it little friend.
Planet Hollywood
3 Stars
Stallone gets accosted by two overanxious fans
Jim runs over to Sly telling him how many times he's seen Rocky and that Stallone is his idol. Tracy runs over and tells him how much he loves Rambo and how he stitched up his wound in prison just like Rambo did. Both Breuer and Morgan are glued to the cue cards during this whole sketch but the way the jump all over Stallone is amusing. Eventually Sly has had enough and tackles them and we get a newspaper headline of how Stallone has been sued for millions and the two idiots are announced as new owners of Planet Hollywood. Amusing but forgettable.
Lou's Lovely Daughters
Jim runs over to Sly telling him how many times he's seen Rocky and that Stallone is his idol. Tracy runs over and tells him how much he loves Rambo and how he stitched up his wound in prison just like Rambo did. Both Breuer and Morgan are glued to the cue cards during this whole sketch but the way the jump all over Stallone is amusing. Eventually Sly has had enough and tackles them and we get a newspaper headline of how Stallone has been sued for millions and the two idiots are announced as new owners of Planet Hollywood. Amusing but forgettable.
Lou's Lovely Daughters
3 Stars
A man hosts a show designed to marry off his daughters
Stallone plays Lou who has 3 lovely daughters that he wants to find men for. So he created a show in his basement to showcase them. Molly is an awkward girl who prides herself on her Mae West impression, Ana is revealed to be pregnant from the last date she went on and Cheri stares at the camera with an almost psychotic look on her face the whole sketch. The performances of the three women and Stallone aide a so-so sketch where Stallone just takes calls and tries to pimp his girls. This could have gone down better avenues but for what it was it was enjoyable.
More Songs I Rewrote To Honor Dead People
Stallone plays Lou who has 3 lovely daughters that he wants to find men for. So he created a show in his basement to showcase them. Molly is an awkward girl who prides herself on her Mae West impression, Ana is revealed to be pregnant from the last date she went on and Cheri stares at the camera with an almost psychotic look on her face the whole sketch. The performances of the three women and Stallone aide a so-so sketch where Stallone just takes calls and tries to pimp his girls. This could have gone down better avenues but for what it was it was enjoyable.
More Songs I Rewrote To Honor Dead People
2 Stars
Elton John has some more songs for the recently deceased
Now that Elton John has reworked Candle In The Wind to honor Princess Di he has re-written more of his famous songs to honor other dead people. The only two we get to hear are "Your Name's Not Daniel: A Tribute To Jimmy Stewart" and "Red Skelton (sung to the tune of Rocket Man)" before the sketch abruptly ends because the show ran out of time. It was apparently aired in its entirety during a rerun of a later broadcast but you would think they would know they didn't have time for this and throw on a commercial rerun.
FINAL ANALYSIS
Now that Elton John has reworked Candle In The Wind to honor Princess Di he has re-written more of his famous songs to honor other dead people. The only two we get to hear are "Your Name's Not Daniel: A Tribute To Jimmy Stewart" and "Red Skelton (sung to the tune of Rocket Man)" before the sketch abruptly ends because the show ran out of time. It was apparently aired in its entirety during a rerun of a later broadcast but you would think they would know they didn't have time for this and throw on a commercial rerun.
FINAL ANALYSIS
"The man is dying and he happens to think Tango and Cash is jackass so you hit him?"
Average
Average
3.2 Stars
MVP
Norm MacDonald
Oprah, Accident, Weekend Update
Oprah, Accident, Weekend Update
Best Sketch
Accident
Worst Sketch
New Car
How I Would Have Lorne Michaels-ed It
It's all in hindsight but it seemed like a waste to put Will Ferrell in an Elton John wig for a sketch they didn't have time for. I would have moved that up earlier in the night and save Fun With Real Audio for the end, time permitting. Shorten Cinder Calhoun or take out Richard Jewell from Update and you should have plenty of time.
Host Analysis
I really liked Stallone throughout the whole night. He strikes me as someone who is able to be funny without knowing that he's funny. He's got that Christopher Walken quality where if you give him funny things to say he'll say them in a bizarre way and they will come out humorous.
Final Thoughts
I was struck by how fully loaded this episode was. So full that they didn't have time for the last sketch. Part of the reason why this episode felt so jam packed was that there was only one musical number. I don't know if this was pre-planned or a time constraint thing. Seeing as how Jamiroquai's first song came after Update I'm assuming it was intentional. I hope this trend continues. Without commercials, SNL episodes are roughly an hour and 10 minutes and when 15 or so of that is taken up by a random pop star of the moment it can drag the whole thing. One is certainly enough. This was a pretty good episode to start things off. Got me looking forward to the rest of the season.
Up Next
Up Next
Who was the 4th Friends cast member to host SNL? Everyone stared in awe as we screamed "Matthew Perry!"
Thanks for this was a surprise,Burgess Meredith died 18 days before this episode aired considering Stallone was hosting is a shame there was no tribute.
ReplyDeleteThat’s some crazy trivia. I didn’t realize that. This episode had so many references to Rocky, you’d think he might have given Mickey a shout out at the good nights
DeleteGreat review! I found it trying to find my current holy grail, the full "More Songs I Rewrote To Honor Dead People" sketch. I distinctly remember catching a later airing and one of the songs was "Crocodile Rock" re-written for Andre the Giant with the lyrics "I remember when I was young, watching wrestling was so much fun," and then later the crescendo was the chorus of "Oh Andre the Gi-i-i-ant, I'm sorry that you're dead." Finding out now that the sketch was cut off during the original airing explains why even the SNL archivists I've reached out to don't seem to have it, and the song rights make it one that might not see a proper broadcast again.
ReplyDeleteBut yeah, love your analysis of Norm as well. He's always the highlight of this era for me.
This is my holy grail as well. I've been searching for this sketch for decades. This is the most info I've found in years. I believe it may be vaulted. Unless there's a person who still has it on tape, it's lost to us.
ReplyDelete