"Forget the cue cards, I don't know what the hell is gonna happen on this show"
Cold Open: Herb
2 Stars
The only man in America to never have a Whopper explains why
Dennis Miller introduces a press conference for Herb, the only man in America to never eat a Burger King Whopper. Quaid comes out in a wheelchair and explains that he has never had one because years ago he had a burger from a competitor and had a severe allergic reaction. When he woke up the doctors told him that he would be confined to a wheelchair for the rest of his life. He wishes no ill will towards Burger King or the fast food industry but wants to cease the negative publicity and the invasion of his privacy. I had absolutely no context for this so assumed it was based on a real thing. I did some research and this is from the Burger King Wikipedia article...
"In November 1985, Burger King spent $40 million on the Where's Herb? advertising campaign. The campaign's premise was that Herb was the only man in America who had never eaten a Whopper. If a customer recognized him in any store, he or she would win US$5,000. The advertisements did not reveal Herb's appearance until the company's Super Bowl commercial, where Herb was revealed to be a bespectacled man in an ill-fitting suit. Herb toured stores across the country, appeared on The Today Show, and served as a guest timekeeper during WrestleMania 2. The campaign had little impact on sales and was quickly dropped."
So I learned something about Burger King's advertising in the 80s. The sketch was just okay.
Harry Dean Stanton Monologue
3 Stars
Harry sings the blues and plays harmonica
Harry comes out and almost immediately launches into a blues song, he plays the harmonica as well and then climbs a ladder to join the band. This had a real fun energy to it and seems like they just let Harry do whatever the hell he wanted to do, which is fine by me. As he walks to the band he passes by a headshot of himself and a peepshow booth, were those always there? I'll have to keep an eye out for that in future episode.
Gulf Coast Furniture Warehouse
Gulf Coast Furniture Warehouse
4 Stars
Rudy Randolph Jr. advertises his "Stink Sale"
I absolutely hated this character the first time I saw him, this time I was cracking up. I have no idea what changed, maybe just timing. Randy Quaid now owns his daddy's company after his daddy fell down dead and now he's selling all the furniture in their warehouse because it stinks. He's not gonna lie to you, all this stuff smells bad but that means big savings. Even this lamp smells bad, "Who would have though that brass could hold an odor?". Robert Downey shows up as his son and goes, in his own words, "full retard", not sure what the hell he's doing, just happy to be on TV I guess. This reminded me of something Aykroyd would do in the first couple year. I really enjoyed this for some reason.
Cleveland Vice
2 Stars
Cleveland cops investigate bowling ball theft
Jon Lovitz and a group of pregnant ladies return their shoes at a bowling alley and then in come Stanton and Randy Quaid. They are here to investigate a string of bowling ball thefts. The theme song for 'Cleveland Vice' starts playing, which the audience laughs very hard at, it's all shots of people walking around in the snow. They talk about how cold it is and then pick up Robert Downey on his way to the bowling alley, they take him back to the station but first have to figure out which bus to take. For some reason Terry Sweeney is playing Joan Rivers at the station picking up her stolen purse. They grill Downey for a bit and then talk in circles until the sketch thankfully ends. I really didn't get this, I mean the concept was fine but it lacked heavily in the execution. Were the pregnant ladies at the beginning hiding the bowling balls in their dresses? Was Harry Dean Stanton drunk, ignoring the cue cards, or both? Why was Joan Rivers in Cleveland?
5 Stars
Dramatization of the death of Bat Masterson
Before I describe this sketch let me just say, this was silly, stupid, made no sense and I loved every second of it. Randy Quaid is Bat, he's losing a game of poker and asks Damon Wayans to go to his ranch to grab some money under his mattress. In walks Harry Dean Stanton who wants revenge on Bat for sending him up the river, not to prison, literally sending him up the river to Bat's ranch to grab some money under his mattress. He was picked up for burglary and sent to prison. Bat warns Stanton that killing him won't bring back his brother to which Stanton asks what Dr. Frankenstein has to say about that. We then cut to Lovitz working on a reanimation machine. There are some more silly things which leads to them about to draw but they can't agree on when to do it. Joan Cusack comes out to explain that Bat died 37 years later, of a heart attack. Things like this probably attributed to coronary problems, certainly didn't help anything. This was just the right amount of stupid to lift my spirits.
The Replacements
"Bastards Of The Young"
I didn't realize that this was a notorious episode until Stanton introduced The Replacements. The band was banned from SNL after this appearance, even though Paul Westerberg performed solo on season 19, because they were apparently drunk off their asses during their set and mouthed profanities into the camera. I didn't notice any profanities, I didn't really notice much of anything as the lyrics were hard to make out. The song was really catchy though and just like when I watched Paul Westerberg in season 19 I was compelled to check out some stuff on iTunes.
Addendum: On 2nd watch, you can barely make out Paul Westerberg say, "Come on fuckers", before an instrumental break.
New Parents
2 Stars
A man resents the things his wife said during labor
Cusack wakes up, glowing after giving birth, but her husband, Lovitz, has a completely different demeanor. He's upset because during labor Cusack said somethings he took offense to, mainly that she called him a wimpy Jew whose mother runs his life. What starts off as a promising avenue for comedy turns saccharine and sweet when they bring out a real life baby and start cooing. There's an interesting beat where Lovitz says that Cusack told him she wished she had married another man and then a nurse comes in with flowers from that man but all that was abandoned with the sight of a real baby. Who's baby was that? Where did they get a newborn baby? How did they get a newborn baby?
Weekend Update With Dennis Miller
"Tonight's winning lottery number is π"
After last episode's high this was more of a low. Miller was stumbling over punchlines, there were more topical jokes and lots of lost punchlines too. He would have a set up and then mumble something. There were a few good gags though my favorite being a list of things that will be closed in observation of Martin Luther King Jr.'s birthday, the last one being the mind of Senator Jesse Helms.
That Black Girl
3 Stars
Parody of 1960s TV, but with a black girl
Joan Cusack is a wealthy dowager complaining to a store manager that she got sprayed with perfume by one of the sales girls.
"Which girl?"
"The girl in red. The shorter one. Ok, I'll say, that black girl!"
Cue the theme song where Danitra Vance is walking through the streets of New York City ala Marlo Thomas. Unfortunately that's where the comedy ends because instead of doing much of anything with this concept the sketch plays out like an episode of 'That Girl' with a black lead. Damon Wayans comes in as her boyfriend and they talk and walk like lame white stereotypes. Terry Sweeney comes in as her agent saying that he got her an audition for a Broadway show, Stanton comes in as the director and at first is shocked to find that she's black but then comes to realize that his show about a southern belle at her catillion could be played by a black girl and that black girl is going to be... Whoopi Goldberg. That Black Girl isn't upset though because she changed someone's mind. I know this isn't the last time we're going to see this sketch so I'm going to hold off judgment for a bit but I hope the next time we see this they subvert the genre they're playing with rather than just do a sketch in that genre. Much like with A Roy Orbison Christmas from last episode, I understand what they are doing, I'm just not sure of the why.
Sam Kinison
"Which girl?"
"The girl in red. The shorter one. Ok, I'll say, that black girl!"
Cue the theme song where Danitra Vance is walking through the streets of New York City ala Marlo Thomas. Unfortunately that's where the comedy ends because instead of doing much of anything with this concept the sketch plays out like an episode of 'That Girl' with a black lead. Damon Wayans comes in as her boyfriend and they talk and walk like lame white stereotypes. Terry Sweeney comes in as her agent saying that he got her an audition for a Broadway show, Stanton comes in as the director and at first is shocked to find that she's black but then comes to realize that his show about a southern belle at her catillion could be played by a black girl and that black girl is going to be... Whoopi Goldberg. That Black Girl isn't upset though because she changed someone's mind. I know this isn't the last time we're going to see this sketch so I'm going to hold off judgment for a bit but I hope the next time we see this they subvert the genre they're playing with rather than just do a sketch in that genre. Much like with A Roy Orbison Christmas from last episode, I understand what they are doing, I'm just not sure of the why.
Sam Kinison
3 Stars
"I don't believe in wife beating, I understand it but I don't support it"
I liked this set much more than the last one, because this one actually had jokes. Sam talks about how he doesn't visit doughnut shops anymore because he's afraid the 60 year old guy working the counter who made poor life decisions will snap one day and then talks about how it's hard to cheat on your girlfriend when you're on the road. I'm not sure if I liked this or I'm just enjoying the episode so much but I didn't feel like skipping through this. Again, Sam Kinison is not my comedic cup of tea.
Big Ball Of Sports
I liked this set much more than the last one, because this one actually had jokes. Sam talks about how he doesn't visit doughnut shops anymore because he's afraid the 60 year old guy working the counter who made poor life decisions will snap one day and then talks about how it's hard to cheat on your girlfriend when you're on the road. I'm not sure if I liked this or I'm just enjoying the episode so much but I didn't feel like skipping through this. Again, Sam Kinison is not my comedic cup of tea.
Big Ball Of Sports
3 Stars
Short film about the forgotten sport of Vulcan Dirt Diving
Jon Lovitz sets this up and then throws to a short film in black and white narrated by Al Franken. We see several competitors participate in the now outlawed sport of Vulcan Dirt Diving. One by one they climb a scaffolding and jump to the ground and sustain injuries. I didn't recognize and writers or cast members in the film so I'm confused as to where this came from but it was funny, if a little repetitive. For some reason each contestant smiles and makes a gleeful noise before jumping to their certain doom.
No Offense
No Offense
1 Star
A drunk at a bar annoys couples
Cusack and Downey are celebrating their 13 week anniversary and keep getting interrupted by Stanton who is sitting next to them and sipping his drink. That's all I got for this sketch, nothing particularly funny happens, Stanton plays a convincing drunk, I have a suspicion that he partied with The Replacements before the show.
Jack's Discount Emporium
5 Stars
Come on down for big saving on Martin Luther King Jr. Day
Lovitz is a sleazy salesman advertising his "Martin Luther King Jr. Day White Sale". We then get Sweeney as Abe Lincoln, Miller as George Washington, Quaid as Sitting Bull, James Downey as Sherlock Holmes and Robert Downey as Tarzan all hocking high quality bedspreads at low low prices. I loved the subtext here, where this guy is being incredibly culturally insensitive on Martin Luther King Jr.'s birthday even to have a man dressed up as a Native American asking, "How. How. How does he do it?"
We end with a rerun of Just Say No To The Army
FINAL ANALYSIS
"I had a dream...that you wanted quality linens at the lowest prices in town"
Average
3 Stars
MVP
Randy Quaid
Herb, Gulf Coast Furniture Warehouse, Cleveland Vice, Death Of A Gunfighter, Jack's Discount Emporium
Herb, Gulf Coast Furniture Warehouse, Cleveland Vice, Death Of A Gunfighter, Jack's Discount Emporium
Best Sketch
Death Of A Gunfighter
Worst Sketch
No Offense
How I Would Have Lorne Michaels-ed It
While I really liked this episode, let me armchair quarterback for a minute and move some stuff around. Since Cleveland Vice doesn't have an ending and Herb does, move Cleveland Vice to the cold open spot, shorten it and end it with "Live From New York...". Monologue is fine but move Jack's Discount Emporium to the first commercial parody just because it's funnier and has the entire cast in it. Then, even though it's my least favorite sketch put No Offense first just to get it out of the way. Then That Black Girl, Weekend Update, make Herb a WU segment in the middle, New Parents, Big Ball Of Sports, Gulf Coast Furniture Warehouse and end with Death Of A Gunfighter. Not sure where to put Sam Kinison but it doesn't really matter.
Host Analysis
Harry Dean Stanton was an old drunk who didn't seem to care much about anything and that's how he hosted the show. It was enjoyable but I don't think I'd want to see him back.
Final Thoughts
Despite a few fumbles, this was a huge step up from last episode. A solid 3 star sketch average was really boosted by two sketches that I think will probably make my best of the year list. This whole episode had a punk rock feel to it, not just because The Replacements were drunk and yelling the F-word during their performance but I think Stanton was drunk too, either he was inebriated or didn't seem to give much of a shit, but it worked either way. Throw in Sam Kinison and you have a real "what the hell am I in for?" vibe.
Up Next
Dudley Moore and Al Green sounds like a promising combination
What an odd bag this show is. It was much better than I remembered from the first time but it’s still all over the place. Stanton and Replacements being smashed is responsible for a good majority of it; the long and weird skits sure didn’t help though.
ReplyDeleteThat Miami Vice parody is just dreadful to watch. It makes not much sense besides the fact it’s trying to parody the show. Things happen and go nowhere, then it gets boring before Sweeney as Rivers shows up for no reason. I remember it just ending and nothing else happening. Death of a Gunfighter I remember oddly liking. I also loved the usage of Dylan’s Knocking on Heaven’s Door it helped the tone of it. Replacements didn’t do too bad either consider how smashed they were. I got so bored by the That Girl parody I turned it off. Need to retry it again. Sucks Stanton had such an odd show.
As for the pictures: Lovitz didn’t really need an update. Hall’s original picture is hilarious (love the stupid face he had,) and I wish they kept it for the kicks, and Sweeney’s pose as a whole was awkward.