“Your head is full of thigh meat”
Cold Open: The Lead With Jake Tapper
2 Stars
Trump’s cabinet picks are so crazy he’s appointed Breaking Bad’s Walter White as head of the DEA. Should have stopped at the premise because seeing it in execution isn’t that great. He said “I am the one that knocks” just like he did on that show! At least it was short.
With the exception of the Dave Chappelle episode this is our first Alec Baldwin-less cold open of the season and it also begins the trend of celebrity cameos in the cold opens which would continue for the next 4 years. So...beginning of the end?
John Cena Monologue
John Cena back when he was pretty much only known as a wrestler, having just appeared in Trainwreck the year previously. Similar to Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson's first monologue it's wrestling-centric. Bobby interrupts as The Waddler to challenge Cena followed by Leslie Jones as herself and Kenan with a chair. I would have liked to see more wrestling personas from the cast. Bobby's The Waddler intro was fun but then Leslie comes out with an intro for herself (because she needs no wrestling moniker) which was funny but would have hit better had we seen 2 or 3 before her. Can't believe I'm pitching a longer monologue, I must have liked it.
Hook A Hunk
Cecily is on a dating show but is quickly enamored by the host instead. I enjoyed their relationship and how it builds so quickly, going to visit the grave of his dead brother, but we lose a lot of points for the ending which is just Beck and Kyle kissing after realizing they have no chance with Cecily. It's not just that it's the old "boys kissing each other = comedy" punchline but it comes out of left field to where I'm left wondering if this whole sketch was just an excuse for it or they were completely stumped for an ending so went to the gay well. Either way it's a big letdown.
The Karate Teen
Mikey is fighting John Cena in a Karate Kid spoof. As soon as you see the setup you can pretty much smell the punchline coming, Mikey is going to get mercilessly beaten but the visual gag of him flying out of his pants and through four walls was funny. Unfortunately they had nowhere to go after that except to repeat it.
Science Presentation
I remembered this episode being good but so far it's just okay. I think I may just be remembering this sketch. John has promised to sit out the big game unless he gets an A+ on his science presentation. The school board is full of obvious football fans so while Mikey and Vanessa give reports on quantum entanglements, John has some bananas nailed to a piece of plywood. John's hilarious here playing right in his wheelhouse as a dumb jock and giving his thesis statement of bananas are a yellow snack monkeys like to eat. Also loved the orange or as he refers to it "round orange banana" and his changing stance on bananas. He used to not like them because they look like boy's wieners but now he likes them because they are yummy.
Dyke & Fats Save Christmas
Didn’t expect to see this again after 3 seasons. The theme song gets all the laughs, especially Kate going all googly-eyed when seeing a lady and Aidy going gaga over a rotisserie chicken. The punchline isn't as strong as the first outing but there in lies the curse of repeating something.
Maren Morris
"My Church"
Weekend Update
Where'd Your Money Go?
Host Charles Barkley as questions to Rob Gronkowski, Conor McGregor, and John Daly about how irresponsible they are with money. Gotta admit, I'm not a sports fan so all these impressions are blowing right by me but I at least get the concept and categories like "Buy A Cheetah" and "Trust A Stripper" are funny.
The Office Tree
Aidy puts the angel on top of the office Christmas tree and ends up falling out the window. As she dangles from the building, still holding the tree, her co-workers debate on what to save first her or their beloved Christmas tree. Good bits from Beck pouring an energy drink in her mouth in hopes that she will go all Popeye and chuck the tree back in the office and giving Aidy a 30 pound kettle drum during the Secret Santa gift exchange. Weird ending with Santa coming to save a falling Aidy but instead rescuing the tree.
Through Donald's Eyes
POV of Trump as he goes about his day, only seeing huge success and himself as John Cena with giant hands. I remember people saying this was the kind of out of the box thinking the show needed to get around the Alec as Trump situation. I would argue you could not do so much Trump humor, but that’s just me.
Maren Morris returns with "80s Mercedes"
Erotic Bookstore
Aidy and John act out some romantic fantasies in between helping customers at an erotic bookstore. A very repetitive sketch with a weak ending but all around enjoyable mostly due to the performances.
United States Of Talent
Mikey and John bring their mighty owl to a talent competition, their owl who recently flew head first into a brick wall. Much like the last Mikey and Cena collaboration we saw I smelled a punchline coming (something gonna happen with that prop owl) but unlike The Karate Teen I didn't know what would happen. The owl starts projectile shitting and puking all over them. I enjoyed the initial sight gag but then it kept going and the only ending they had was to have Kenan berate their act for way too long.
Average
2.9 Stars
MVP
Beck Bennett
The Lead With Jake Tapper, Monologue (VO), Hook A Hunk, The Karate Teen (VO), Science Presentation, The Office Tree, Through Donald's Eyes, Erotic Bookstore, United States Of Talent
Best Sketch
Science Presentation
Worst Sketch
United States Of Talent
How I Would Have Lorne Michaels-ed It
The cold open was really weak but the rest of the show had an even level of consistent quality. Nothing classic but nothing terrible and a couple of really good sketches. I would have swapped the two game show sketches just because the man on man kissing of Hook A Hunk, excuse the phrase, left a bad taste in my mouth.
Host Analysis
Seeing how his movie career really took off shortly after this, it's a little baffling that he hasn't been back. Compared to other athlete hosts he was top notch, and compared to your average SNL host he was pretty damn good. It also felt like he really wanted to be there. I got that sense during the monologue and that held true up to the goodnights where he seemed delighted and proud of himself but also humble and grateful for the opportunity.
Final Thoughts
Not as great as I remember it but pretty good. I think at the time I was more impressed with Cena's charisma more than the episode itself. I had seen him in Trainwreck but was only passingly familiar with him as a wrestler and he really got to show off his comedic skills here. Going in with low expectations probably helped a lot as watching it for a second time 7 years later was a bit of a letdown but not by a whole lot. All in all, a pretty good episode with a likable host and decent musical guest.
Up Next
Soon to be Oscar winner Casey Affleck hosts the last episode of 2016 with future host Chance The Rapper.
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