“I would like to feed your fingerprints to the wolverines”
Cold Open: Wolverines
5 Stars
Simple, short, and funny. Michael O’Donoghue gives an English lesson to John with bizarre sentences involving wolverines. He has a heart attack and John, thinking it’s part of the lesson, also has a heart attack. Chevy comes out and says the first “Live from New York…”. It’s only iconic because it’s the first one. Obviously they didn’t know the show would still be going 50 years later. But it’s still fun and I love that the first cold open is such a one-joke premise that gets in and out in 90 seconds.
We get the first gaffe in the show’s history and it comes from Don Pardo who introduces the not for ready prime time players.
George Carlin Monologue
5 Stars
(Combined rating for all Carlin segments)
It’s so cool that George Carlin is the first host. That was one of the things that got me into SNL. I loved Carlin for as long as I can remember. I had Carlin On Campus memorized at at an age when I was undoubtedly too young to be watching it. I remember watching his HBO specials and slowly starting to get more jokes each and every time I watched them again. He starts the show with his baseball and football routine which isn’t my absolute favorite but it’s a good one.
New Dad
Our first fake commercial. New Dad will take over if you die to take care of your family and fuck your wife.
Billy Preston
“Nothing From Nothing”
Trial
Jane is on the stand and is having trouble telling the jury what her attacker said to her. She writes it on a piece of paper and it gets passed down. When it gets to a sleeping Gilda she thinks it’s John trying to pick her up and gives him a wink. I appreciated the slow build up to the punchline and Gilda shines in her first appearance with no lines.
Andy Kaufman
A next level genius bit. There’s not much more I can say about it. Andy lip syncs to the Mighty Mouse theme song but only one line. Drinking a glass of water while he waits for his cue is just a brilliant move.
George Carlin
George makes some observations about life like why you can never find the good scissors, a dog’s day off, throwing away an old trash can, and the weird piece of bacon.
Janis Ian
“At Seventeen”
Victims Of Shark Bite
Another sketch that’s basically just a setup and a punchline. John is on a talk show for shark bite victims. It is quickly apparent that he has two arms and the sketch is over. Very glad they didn’t belabor this, not sure where else it could go.
Jamitol
Don’t get this one. Chevy and his wife played by Mr. Mike talk about iron supplements. My best guess is that this is a spoof on a real commercial and the joke is that it’s two gay guys.
Next Week
Paul Simon tells us to stay tuned next week when he hosts and reunites with his old friend Art Garfunkel. Don’t know how much I’ll have to say about that one. It’s been awhile since I’ve seen it but pretty sure it’s almost exclusively musical performances.
Weekend Update
Triopenin
We get a mid-Update commercial for an arthritis medicine with a child-proof cap.
The Land Of Gorch
And it’s the debut of The Land Of Gorch. I haven’t seen these since I was a kid and even then I remember being bored as hell by them. I loved The Muppets and was excited that they were on SNL. Two of my favorite things coming together. I’m looking forward to revisiting them, I’m sure they still suck but I’m gonna keep an open mind. The puppetry is hella impressive but this feels unscripted and meandering. The king’s wife is having trouble releasing her darts (I got no idea what that’s supposed to mean, some sort of gas problem I suppose) so he goes to a stone thing for advice. The stone thing tells him that things could be worse. It’s a long walk to nowhere but I can’t say it wasn’t interesting. These things gotta get better to hold my interest though.
George Carlin
A Film By Albert Brooks
The Impossible Truth
News of crazy events happening around the world brings us to a blind cabbie, the country of Israel and the state of Georgia switching places, and the age of consent being lowered to 8 so we end on a creeptastic date between a grown man and a child. The first two were fun the last one was skeevy. I wish Albert gave us one more to wash the taste of that out of my mouth.
Bee Hospital
A bunch of bees wait for the birth of their children. They’re happy for drones, bummed for workers, and aghast at a queen. This was lame and dumb. Feels like something a grade school kid would write after science class.
Academy Of Better Careers
I like the idea of this one, all the commercials that end with “operators are standing by” need people to work as the operators so this commercial promises you an exciting career answering phones for as-seen-on-TV advertisements. I like that idea but this is so quick it’s almost like I enjoy it after the fact. Oh, that was a clever concept. Did you laugh? No. Gilda does some very good bad commercial acting though.
Valri Bromfield
Our second stand-up comedian of the night Valri does a bit where she pretends to be a school teacher addressing her students and then a popular girl at pep rally. It’s not a bad bit and it’s short. It almost feels like an SNL audition, kinda like when Denny Dillon just showed up on stage with her sock puppet in Season 6.
Show Us Your Guns
Random people on the street show their guns. A woman pulls one out of her baby carriage, an old lady pulls one out of her purse, a robber and a store owner both show theirs after a robbery, a couple of mafia goons pretend they don’t have any, a cop can’t find his, and a whole wedding party brandish their pieces as the rice is being thrown. I loved this and it’s sadly more relevant every year.
George Carlin
Billy Preston
“Fancy Lady”
Home Securities
Dan stages a home invasion to sell security systems. This is the only sketch that feels like it’s from SNL, probably because it’s the only one that’s an actual sketch and not a knock knock joke. Very well written and acted especially Dan who fires off rapid fire dialogue. Also, Gilda continues to shine. I enjoyed her response to if she’d want to be sexually assaulted in her own kitchen.
Triple-Trac
Wait a minute, a razor with three blades? SNL, you so crazy. I did like the final line of “because you’ll believe anything” but this obviously doesn’t hold up. I like thinking about the guy who wrote this saying “Oh, now people need two blades on their razors?” as he applies tiny squares of toilet paper to his face. Sometimes change is good especially when it comes to advancements in the field of dragging a sharp blade across your face. I for one am glad that we’ve improved the shaving experience.
Janis Ian
“In The Winter”
FINAL ANALYSIS
“Watch this Jesus, left turn”
Average
3.25 Stars
MVP
Close call but I’m going with
Gilda Radner
Trial, Bee Hospital, Academy Of Better Careers, Show Us Your Guns, Home Securities
Best Sketch
Home Securities
Worst Sketch
Jamitol
How I Would Have Lorne Michaels-ed It
It’s the first episode so I can’t be too harsh. I love the pace of the show. The only time I started to get bored was during The Land Of Gorch. Other than that everything got in and out before you had the chance to get tired of it.
Host Analysis
More of a Master of Ceremonies but he fit into that role nicely. His monologue and interstitials felt relaxed and off-the-cuff (even though he’s just doing bits from his act). He was a fun presence throughout the show and kept things moving. I needed a minute or two of George every now and then and I got it.
Final Thoughts
I can’t call it a home run but it was a fun show. And even the things that didn’t quite work were at least interesting. It’s a classic for Andy Kaufman alone. There’s enough staples here to make it feel like SNL but it’s not quite a show yet. This felt like a hodgepodge of a variety show and honestly I wouldn’t have been shocked if the network just decided to ditch the cast and have a comedian introduce musical acts and stand-ups on Saturday night. As the start of an almost 50 year institution it’s a must watch but for the first episode of SNL it’s a little confounding that it took off just based off this alone. I’ve seen the majority of this season before just via reruns but I’ve never watched it straight through episode by episode so it’ll be fun seeing the show evolve into a cohesive product. When exactly does it start to feel like SNL?
Up Next
It won’t be next week when Paul Simon and friends sing some songs with a few filmed bits thrown in.
I always took the “trouble releasing my darts” thing from the Land of Gorch to be a cramps reference.
ReplyDeleteI think you’re going to enjoy Chevy’s tenure and the lower-key but sometimes wild Belushi. Gilda, Dan, and Jane are fully formed from the very beginning too with each of them demonstrating their wide array of talents in the very first episode. Laraine and especially Garrett I feel get lost in the shuffle this episode, but they will certainly have some breakthrough moments in the coming episodes.
The Albert Brooks film…. I guess 1975 was just a different time. I know he has some good ones throughout the season though. The one where they do a trailer for upcoming NBC TV shows was a classic.